Okay, I have a confession to make. I have become one of the myriad of “golden agers” who have joined the pickleball craze. I was never one for team sports; they were always way too much pressure for me. But I could never resist a ping pong table, and there my inner competitive monster would always come out. Friends who had seen me at the ping pong table said I’d love pickleball and, no, it didn’t require nearly as much energy as tennis, so I thought, why not, “I’ll give it a try.”
And that was the last mild-mannered phrase you have since heard me utter about pickleball.
Here are a few of the things I absolutely love about pickleball:
- You are constantly being yelled at to stay out of the kitchen;
- I’m nowhere near a computer;
- The majority of folks playing are my age or older;
- It’s a great way to meet people who are rarely going to have the time to ask you any tax questions; and
- Unlike golf, you can always find the ball after you hit it.
And now that I’ve become hooked, I highly recommend my fellow tax professionals to join in, especially during tax season. I know, you’re thinking I’m crazy, but hear me out.
First, pickleball scoring is significantly less complicated than calculating alternative minimum tax. When your brain is fried from determining whether your client's crypto trades constitute a wash sale, there's something refreshing about a scoring system that doesn't require a master's degree to understand. Plus, shouting “7-3-2!” is far more satisfying than working with balance sheets.
The “kitchen” rule in pickleball (where you can't volley from the non-volley zone) is also oddly familiar to tax practitioners. Just as you wouldn't dare step into the kitchen during a game, you know better than to step into certain tax positions without substantial authority. Both mistakes can result in painful penalties, though at least pickleball doesn't involve IRS notices.
Consider the therapeutic benefits: Every dink shot is an opportunity to release the pent-up frustration of dealing with clients who bring their tax documents in a shoebox. Each serve becomes a symbolic launching of those passive activity loss limitations into the stratosphere. And nothing beats the stress relief of smashing a pickleball after spending hours on hold with the IRS.
Moreover, the social aspect of pickleball provides a much-needed escape from tax isolation. Instead of talking to your office plant about depreciation schedules, you can discuss them with fellow players who will quickly change the subject to literally anything else.
Remember: Tax season is temporary, but pickleball addiction is forever. Besides, the only audit you'll face on the court is whether your serve was actually out. And unlike tax disputes, those can be settled with a friendly “do-over.”
