Yo ho ho, Merry Christmas
Now that everyone has those Ring doorbell cameras, the internet abounds with footage of people's holiday shopping deliveries being stolen by the unscrupulous hornswagglers known as porch pirates. They'll often trail delivery trucks, swooping in to steal packages left unattended. Theft of property valued at $950 or less is a misdemeanor, rather than a felony, as it was prior to the passage of Proposition 47 in 2014.
Not in my curtilage
Enter SB 979 (Jones),1 which would "prohibit a person from entering the curtilage of a residential dwelling, as defined, with the intent to commit theft of a package shipped through the mail or delivered by a public or private carrier."
P.S. "Curtilage" is an area adjacent to or in the immediate area of the dwelling, for example a porch, doorstep, patio, stoop, driveway, hallway, or enclosed yard.
The bill would also increase the punishment for repeat porch piracy: up to three years in county jail. The current punishment for stealing packages is less than one year in jail, which still sounds horrible to a law-abiding citizen like myself, but proponents of the bill believe the current lax punishment under Proposition 47 is to blame for the increase in crime.2
There are only 306 shopping days left until Christmas 2020, so let's hope some action is taken to stop the plundering of packages by these bilge-sucking sons of biscuit-eaters.3
1 http://leginfo.legislature.ca.gov/faces/billTextClient.xhtml?bill_id=201920200SB979
2 www.sandiegouniontribune.com/opinion/story/2019-09-26/california-porch-package-theft-laws
3 www.piratevoyages.com/pirate-lingo/